TERRELL OWENS--CREDENTIALS
- Five-time Pro Bowl wide receiver
- Holds the record for most receptions in a game
- Like Chad Johnson, is equally known for his touchdown celebrations
- The "Desperate Housewives" opening on Monday Night Football
- The Donovan McNabb incident
- He single-handedly destroyed the Eagles' 2005 season
- Jeff Garcia is gay
- He has 25 million reasons not to commit suicide
- He spits on opponents
- Every single thing he does is scrutinized to death on ESPN
- The term "publicity whore" doesn't even begin to describe him
- One of baseball's best hitters
- Gets in fights with fans
- Accuses everyone he disagrees with (but not himself) of racism
- Racism accusations are sure to get you ESPN attention, because the audience is sure to get riled up about it (see ESPN playing up the Pacman Jones "thug" angle)
- Latin players are easier to control
- Derek Jeter is not black
- Latest accusations of racism mostly dismissed by ESPN (and the media in general) because he threw three of ESPN's Sacred Cows under the bus (Derek Jeter, Joe Torre, and the Yankees)
- Said he wouldn't play in the World Baseball Classic because he wasn't getting paid.
- Said he made errors on purpose when he was with the Brewers
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